thepigeoncoop

Musings about life in the Pigeon household

Mother’s Day

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I was going through old files and pictures on the computer and actually came across this file buried in our backup memory or whatever it’s called.

It was the speech I gave at my Mom’s funeral service.

Seeing as it is Mother’s Day coming up, I thought I would post some of that. WARNING: Don’t read this if you are my brother and at work first thing in the morning:

“… Over the last few years, our little family has been evolving. First my husband, Jason, was added to the clan. Then along came my children – they changed our family big-time! And Cindy completed the expansion of our family when she finally put to rest our begging and pleading and became Shawn’s wife.

Now our family has shifted again.

But Mom is with us. I know this. I see her in the tulips popping from the soil that she insisted I plant in my front yard. I see her in my face and hear her in my voice. I see her in the eyes of my children.

Some of you may know this already, but my mom was my best friend. We talked every day. Every morning at 8, I would call her or she would phone me and we’d talk and gossip and laugh. And if we didn’t hear from each other by 8:15, we were calling the other person, wondering what the holdup was. As my husband teased, some days we talked two or three or seven times and it was usually about nothing important, but we would go on and on. I could tell her everything.

And I could count on Mom for anything. To help with my boys at the drop of a hat. Whether I had a doctor’s appointment or had to head out for an errand, she would sit on the phone and convince me how much easier and faster it would be for me to go and do whatever it was I needed to do if she came over to sit with the boys. She loved it. Popping by for an hour, or staying all day, to see her boys. Playing trucks or feeding them or bathing them.  

Taking them to the park, and having lazy times on the couch and learning more than she ever needed to know about tractors. Having sleepovers, watching them play in her backyard and skate on her ice and swim in her lake.

She helped me so much.

Mom was so proud when I was accepted into University, and she never let me see how heartbroken she was to see her family of four break up when I went away to school.

She loved my husband, Jason, before he was my husband.

She hugged me SO tight when I first told her she was going to be a Grandma. And when I told her she was going to be a Grandma again.

She packed up my house and proceeded to unpack our stuff in our new home when I was 7 months pregnant.

She rolled her eyes, laughed with joy and hugged me tight again when I told her she’d be a Grandma a third time!

She taught me so much.

She taught me to wear makeup so it looks like you aren’t wearing any.

She taught me how to garden even though we were both pretty useless at it.

She taught me how to make gravy.

She taught me that white shoes shouldn’t be worn after Labor Day.

She made our house a home. She loved and supported my Dad and made him happy. She loved me and my brother equally and unconditionally. She loved our dogs, Trail and Sam.

People always used to say we looked so much alike and as a teenager I would just roll my eyes like teenage girls do. But now I take it as such a compliment.

This past Sunday, Dad gave me a pile of books that Mom had on her dresser and asked if there was anything I’d be interested in keeping.

A piece of paper fell out of one of the books (a true crime novel, the kind both she and Shawn loved to read). It turned out to be a letter I wrote and gave to Mom the week before her colon operation, almost a year and a half ago.

I’d like to read a bit of that letter now;

Tuesday, December 14, 2004

Mom;

…I admire you so much for raising such a close, loving family. I always looked at you as someone who gave up so much to be at home, and now that I’m a Mom, I realize that if my family can be half as close as you, Dad, me and Shawn are, then no sacrifice is too great.

My heart is just too full to write a lot of what I feel when it comes to family and especially to you.

I just can never measure up to being half the person you are. But I will spend my life trying.

I want to live with you as my perfect example of a mom, wife, partner, friend, sister, and grandma!

I love that my children have you in their lives. I never want that to go away. They’re so lucky to know you. You’ve been through so much in your life, and every part of it has made you this fabulous woman everyone loves today.

Your courage and strength shows through in everything you’ve had to face in your life and I know it is that same strength that will help you now.

And if that ever fails you, you have the greatest and deepest love from your whole family and we will help carry you through.

You mean the world to Shawn and me.

Thank you. For even the little things.

For wanting me to call you so you know how the boys did with their flu shots.

For buying a beautiful home on the lake so we can come over all the time.

For thinking of a future with your grandkids in it.

For the cleaning lady!

For making my maternity clothes, graduation dress and my wedding veil.

For putting me through university so I can be at home with three boys, eating Kraft Dinner.

Caring for me through all my pregnancies and afterwards.

For still worrying about me. Because some days it seems like you’re the only one and I thank God so much for you.

You’re one person I can talk to who makes me feel like I’m doing an okay job with my life and my family when I myself don’t feel like I have a clue what’s going on.

For all of this and more.

Thank you for being my mom.

And I thank God for letting me be your daughter.

I love you, Mom.

Love forever and always,

Tracy

How will our family shift in the future? What changes lie in store for this little family?

Whatever happens, Mom will be watching all of us, guiding us and loving us.

I love you, Mom.”

Well, that’s part of the speech I gave five years ago. And you know what? I can remember her fondly and with love. I’ll be talking about my mom with my boys this weekend while I’m (hopefully) being spoiled rotten by my family!

Happy Mothers Day everyone!

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4 thoughts on “Mother’s Day

  1. DAMMIT!!! WHY??? WHY DO I NOT LISTEN TO YOUR WARNINGS!?!?!? “sigh”…… I love that speech. No one can put mom’s memory into words as well as you do!

  2. so beautiful Tracey!! I’m just bawling now too….*hugs*

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